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A Boy’s Life

After almost five months here, we finally have a sense of normal and dare I say routine. Well as much routine as a family of young children in a foreign country can manage. Here is a basic outline of the boys’ day:

7:00am: wake up time (except we rarely manage to be awake at this time)

7:15am: oh, no! get out of bed! get out of bed!

7:20am: Yitzi, get dressed! Shalom, Yitzi can’t play now it’s time for school!

7:30am: Yitzi comes downstairs dressed (mostly) and has breakfast. We still have American style breakfasts of oatmeal/cereal. From what I understand Israelis eat exotic dairy products and salad and such. Shalom is hopefully also dressed and eating. I am happy if at least one of those activities is occurring. Mordechai has yet to have a real routine. Sometimes he is awake at this point, sometimes he sleeps through the excitement.

7:45am: Yitzi heads to school. The official start time is 7:30 but after a month or so I discovered almost nobody is there at that time including the teacher (rebbe). I aim to send him in the middle, not the first boy and not the last. We live about one minute away from his school. Israeli kids are known for being more independent and so Yitzi would be mortified if I walked him to school.

8:00am: Shalom’s school begins. Again I have discovered most boys don’t come on time. For my own sanity I try to get him out of the house by 8:15. His class is a minute and a half from us. Just recently I started letting him walk by himself to school though 4 year olds are a little more prone to wandering about on their way. We’ll see…

SCHOOL: Dan or I will probably post more later about their school. It is a chareidi (ultra orthodox for want of a better word) school run by the Zilberman family. The boys’ rebbes do not really speak any English so all instruction is in Hebrew. Many of the boys in their classes come from English speaking homes which has been good and bad for the boys. It has eased their adjustment but slowed down their language skills.

Shalom goes to school Sunday-Thursday from 8:00 to 1:00 and on Fridays until 12:00pm. Yitzi has school Sunday-Friday from 7:30-1:00 and on Saturdays (Shabbat) from 2:00-3:30pm. Yitzi is actually really happy to be going to school on Shabbat. It is not too long, includes a recess and treats, and is generally fun for him.

1:00pm (on a typical day) The boys come home from school with all their triumphs and grievances and we eat lunch. If we were Israeli we would be having a large meal probably involving schnitzel. We are Americans though and are currently in a melted cheese sandwich rut. Dan comes home from yeshivah for a lunch break around 2:00pm.

2:30 Yitzi’s Hebrew tutor comes. During this time I am often working with Shalom on his reading homework from school. Yitzi also spends some afternoons working in a math book that we brought so he could keep up with his class in Chicago.

Chugim – So with school getting out so early here, what is a mommy to do? Enter the chugim industry. A plethora of after school clubs/activities (chugim) pop up every fall to entertain, educate, and enrich. I limited the boys to two chugim that they both attend. On Sundays we go to Mommy and Me Music with Ima Debbie (not me, phew!). A very talented mother leads the kids through songs and stories mostly in English. It has been a great release for the boys with comfortable and familiar songs in a welcoming fun environment. On Tuesdays they go to a cooking class run by a sweet teenage girl out of her home. This chug is mainly in Hebrew but the boys love it. I am not totally sure why. They make cookies, challah, blintzes, even a salad. I think the girl just has a good way of making all the boys feel special and helpful. Or maybe it’s just for the cookies.

6:00pm We are heading to dinner if I am lucky.

Wishful thinking bedtimes – Shalom by 7:00 and Yitzi by 8:00. I don’t know if it’s the new baby or being in Israel but my firm grip on bedtimes has disintegrated.

Between Channukah and catching many (though blissfully not all) Israeli viruses we haven’t been getting out of the Old City too much lately. Before then we would go out once or twice a week to do errands or explore. The boys love going on the bus or train. They are not so fond of all the walking our car-less urban life includes. Before winter really set in we would also spend more time playing outside particularly in the square by our house. I assume once the days get longer again we will be drawn back outside again.

 

Shopping

Many folks have been asking me about daily life, and tonight I am inspired to expand upon grocery shopping. This is not a simple feat for a girl used to hopping in the old minivan and  hauling groceries about. First, we have no car.  Secondly, the Old City is truly separated from the rest of Jerusalem. There is one narrow road that snakes around the Armenian and Jewish Quarters for cars, cabs, scooters, small buses and trucks.

Makolets. As mentioned previously there are a handful of makolets (convenience type stores) that have most of the basics: dairy, eggs, bread, snacks, noodles, grains, canned goods. They also have a decent amount of American style foods (e.g. canned cranberry sauce) due to the large number of Americans here. Some of them deliver large orders otherwise you have to shlepp the groceries over the cobblestoned steps and hills of the Old City.

At first, the clerks at the makolets we frequent barely looked at me and certainly did not go out of their way to help me. Sometime in the last month, they have figured out that I am a regular and life has changed. I am “in”. While this has not led to cheaper groceries, it has made shopping more enjoyable. They greet me when I come in, quickly help me when I am stuck, and I trust them to keep an eye on the baby if the stroller doesn’t fit down the aisle I want to go on. One manager is always quick to tell me what is on sale that week and will help me carry my purchases to the cash register.

I have not quite figured out lines in Israel. Rather, the lack of lines. Everyone sort of bunches by the registers. If they are only buying one or two things they will wave it at the cashiers hoping to be bumped up or noticed so that they can just leave the money on the counter and leave. For all the disorder, people are actually pretty patient about waiting; people rarely yell or complain. Then again Israelis have to spend alot of time waiting: at the store, the post office, the bus, the bank…

Meat. Most people I know have their meat delivered to them from one of the main butchers outside the Old City. What could be more awesome than home delivered meat? If only I could figure out the cuts of meat. They are numbered and not quite the same as the U.S.. Also, they add water to a lot of the meat which is definitely to be avoided.

Produce. Israelis are known for loving fresh produce and we try to take advantage of it. Again, not so simple in the Old City. Some folks make a weekly trip to the main shuk/market at Mahane Yehuda. With the baby in tow, this is not the easiest or most pleasurable way for me.

There is a produce store in the Jewish Quarter run by an Arab man. At first he barely spoke to me and I felt like an obnoxiously loud American. Now that he knows I am a regular he will say hello and point out riper fruit or veggies. His quiet demeanor is so beautiful to me. I have never heard him raise his voice above a low mummur, and I often have to ask him to repeat himself. So peaceful compared to the chaos and hubub of the Jewish Quarter. On my walk to the store I am likely to encounter: loud drums and singing from at least on bar mitzvah procession, the call of a tour guide, a motor scooter zipping along the pedestrian walkways, and/or a car honking in the parking lot to alert the guard to raise the gate. Whew!

I have also been dipping my toe into the real “scene” when it comes to produce in the Jewish Quarter. A local family has a home business organizing a weekly produce delivery. Orders are accepted Sunday and Monday. The form is all in Hebrew, so I feel so proud every time I fill it out. But then comes Wednesday night. Starting at 7:30pm, people come to pick up their food and it is a madhouse. The boxes of food line the street and everyone grabs bags and races around in a crowd grabbing their produce. It’s first come first serve and once something runs out, tough luck. I have yet to totally fill my order. I am too slow trying to figure out what I ordered, where it is, and how to get through the crowd. Larger families work together and divide and conquer. Some lucky parents send their older children out to do it for them.

I have to say I like the craziness of it. I never depend on it for all of my produce, or else I would get frustrated. It is a great snapshot of real life here. For all the intensity of the crowd everyone is respectful and often even helpful. Nobody really pushes, and I have yet to see a fight over the last bag of lettuce. And the prices are right!

After collecting your produce you then line up to have your order weighed and added up. This is a whole different process of jockeying and turn taking. Finally after this line comes the line to pay. Again, notice all the lines and waiting involved. I generally think of Americans as more patient than Israelis, but maybe we just funnel our impatience into avoiding lines as much as possible.

Baked goods. This is really Dan’s turf. There are two main bakeries in the Jewish Quarter and Dan goes out every Friday morning to buy challah and treats for Shabbat. They have so many yummy pastries we have a hard time resisting. The boys have not taken to the pastries as quickly as we have. The one sweet they can resist!

Figuring out daily life here is such a work in progress. Someone just shared a link to a distributor that delivers grocery items in bulk (e.g. a case of tomato sauce). It has been hard to adjust to not being able to buy things in bulk (oh, Sam’s Club who knew how I would miss you!). So I am excited to test this out.

 

 

Spambots step up their game

Seems the spambots have found this blog, and are trying furiously to comment. The first strange thing is that many of them don’t seem to have links embedded. Not sure what benefit they get, then… maybe they’re dedicated to spam lishmah.

The other strange thing is how quasi-substantive the spam is, and how topical. These bots must latch on to key words to be able to tell this is a Jewish blog, with Torah ideas, and post “appropriately.” For example, here’s one attempted spam comment (wait, am I doing their will by posting it here?):

before I consider Rabash not only the fowlloer of his father Baal HaSulam, but I see him as one of the greatest Kabbalaists, who explained to us how to use all the knowledge given by Baal haSulam in our inner work, and Rav Tzvi, as well as all the rest of contemporary kabbalists here in Israel and abroud, have first to study Rabash and his comments on TES, before they have, if the Creator will wish, something additional to say on Zohar and Ar’i Za’l.     But Rav Tzvi as well as all the others have a right to present his work and comments in the form of books and websites and if there are people who may use his work for their spiritual correction, I will be the last to say to them not to do it.     Today is the day of the correction of Gevurah of Malkhut=Discipline in Nobility, and that is what Rav Simon Jacobson has to say about it:      There is another factor in the discipline of sovereignty: determining the area in which you have jurisdiction and authority. And some of the questions that he gives as to answer is: Do I recognaize when I am not an authority and Do I respect the authority of others?    For me Rabash is the highest authority on Baal haSulam’s teaching and as you know you may not clame your PhD, if you haven’t studies all the literature on the topic, and only then you are allowed to say what you personally have to say on this topic.    And for those who try to comment on Baal haSulam without studing Rabash, there is a good advice given by Rav Simon Jacobson: Before taking an authoritative position on any given issue, pause and reflect if you have the right and the ability to exersice authority in this situation.     And as I said the authority of the Rabash is not only  of the one of the fowlloers of Baal haSulam, but it is a complete method of inner spiritual work, which is the final purpose of studing Torah, Gemmrah, Zohar, TES and all the comments of our Sages.

Weird, no?

A worthwhile read

Our friend Moshe Krakowski sent me a link to this famous 1977 Rolling Stone article by a woman whose brother had become a ba’al teshuvah back in the early days of Aish HaTorah. I’d read it before, but couldn’t help reading it again. Such an amazingly honest and open piece.

Anyway, it isn’t directly about our present trip – we’re well past the point of deciding to commit to an observant Jewish lifestyle – but since it is about another journey to Jerusalem, it seems to make sense to share it here.